Helpful Translation Provided...

Steve Benen, Washington Monthly's in-house dimwit, is horrified by intensified right-wing evilness at CNN:

THIS IS CNN?.... If I didn't get independent confirmation of this, I honestly would have assumed the announcement was some elaborate practical joke. Alas, it's true.

Actually, the most elaborate practical joke that could ever involve CNN would be fooling people into thinking someone not stuck in an airport was out there watching CNN.

Anyway, here's what has Steve in a snit:

Prominent conservative commentator and RedState.com editor Erick Erickson will join CNN as a political contributor, appearing primarily on CNN's new show John King, USA, the network announced Tuesday.

And when I say a snit, I mean a snit:

This is easily the worst decision CNN has ever made. That the network probably reviewed Erickson's work before hiring him, and offered him a job anyway, suggests CNN's professional standards for what constitutes "an important voice" have all but disappeared.

The point here isn't that it's disappointing to see CNN hire yet another conservative voice, adding to its already-large stable of conservative voices. To be sure, it's frustrating, but it's nothing new.

CNN has an "already-large stable of conservative voices"? Right...

Anyway, it turns out CNN isn't the real problem at all:

The problem here is with Erickson himself.

Of course it is. It always is. Then Steve-O goes on to detail that Erickson is a crazed right-wing extremist (hey, aren't they all?) worthy of a health dose of oppression:  

There was a point when major professional outlets would look at a voice like this as an "extremist," to be shut out of the mainstream of America's civil discourse. CNN, however, considers this record of radical rhetoric, and concludes it should pay him to offer on-air political commentary.

Shocking. Free speech sucks, doesn't it, Stevie?

To wrap it up, Benen piles on the stupid:

CNN will no doubt hear about blog posts like this one, and assume that liberals are angry because the network hired a right-wing blogger. But that's not it -- there are thoughtful, intelligent conservative bloggers in the country, who occasionally have insightful things to say. The problem here is that Erick Erickson isn't one of them.

This is a genuinely sad day for American journalism. CNN ought to be ashamed of itself.

And remember, for guys like Steve Benen, Glenn Reynolds qualifies as a thoughtful, intelligent conservative blogger. Moron.

But none of that actually matters.

What really has Steve Benen's goat is something completely different, and to prove to you just how reading Dennis the Peasant makes you a better, more-informed citizen, I'm going to provide you a helpful, five word translation of his post:

CNN should have hired me.

That's about the nub of it. It ain't about Erick Erickson... It's about Steve Benen.

You're welcome, and there will be no charge.

(By the way, who the fuck is Eric Erickson?)

Comments

[richard mcenroe]

Never mind CNN's worst decision, what the hell was Erickson thinking, shrinking his audience like that?

[Eric Blair]

Who the fuck is Steve Benen?

(And what do you want to bet he doesn't even watch CNN?)

[bandit]

No he's right - I mean Candy Crowley and Christine ama...really bring in the viewers - look at the numbers. Oh wait...

[Kim du Toit]

The real question is why someone like Eric Erickson (whoever he is) would want to work at that morally-bankrupt institution?

And if you exclude "paycheck" from your list of reasons, it becomes even more inexplicable.

[J West]

1. Paycheck is everything, be it Erickson, Benen or me.
2. Would be thrilled to share my accumulated fund of political wisdom for a buck.
3. Or anybody else's, for that matter.
4. Amazing what effect becoming poor has had on my morals.
5. You are a bigger celebrity than Erickson or Benen, Mr. du Toit. Almost in Dennis' league.
V/R JWest

[richard mcenroe]

"Actually, the most elaborate practical joke that could ever involve CNN would be fooling people into thinking someone not stuck in an airport was out there watching CNN"

And bedridden veterans in VA hospitals...

[kimberly]

"This is easily the worst decision CNN ever made."

Hiring this particular commenter is far, far worse than intentionally not reporting Saddam's atrocities in exchange for access. Or, ejaculating premature Quagmire! at the beginning of the Iraq War. ETC.

The Vietnamese who do my nails keep FOX on. While I can't watch that, either, it's b/c the pretty nail polishes are too distracting.

[Mike Myers]

Kimberly the lady in the front of the cobbler shop where I get my shoes repaired is Vietnamese. She's married to a Bulgarian who grew up and learned his trade in Bulgaria then got the hell out. I don't even try to figure out where a Bulgarian man met a Vietnamese woman. Some mysteries in life are insoluble.

You want to know a couple of people who watch Fox News? You want to know a couple of people who rant about the socialist/communist Obama, and the deleterious changes in American society brought on by leftists? They've lived under socialist regimes, and they aren't having anymore any time soon. You come on down to the local cobbler shop. You'll get an earful every time. And you'll get a nice shoe repair job as well.

[kansas]

CNN does have that big stable of conservatives. For example there is............, hmmm, can't think of anyone.

[richard mcenroe]

Mike, you know what that ditz Kimberley got out of that?

"Conservative views are cobblers..."

[TmjUtah]

The guy who resoles my boots makes a profit, or he goes out of business.

I wish he'd run for the senate...

[Texasyank]

Airport, hospital, treadmill at the gym.

The geniuses where I go configured two sets on TV row to CNN and two for MSNBC. Guy jogging to my left home-schools his kids with his wife--this is Jersey Village, Texas, it's called knowing your market, and I'm talking to you, Mr. LA Fitness Assistant Manager. The clients all get treated to (at least for us silent, and for that thank God) images of Larry O'Donnell braying like a drunk in the corner bar.

[Jim Ryan]

This post disgusts me. This is Steve Benen we're talking about here. Steve Benen. How dare you!

[ditz kimberly]

Ditz? TY very much, Richard ;). I vote (and hold my nose) Republican and the Janes mag I prefer is Defence. What have you got against "pick colah"? I like those Vietnamese who are hustling for an American buck and doing quite well. It's comforting they prefer FOX to CNN, but who in her right mind would want to listen to (justified) conservative outrage when having one's hands massaged??

Would you like your nails buffed to Beck or your hair coiffed to Hannity, I ask?

[richard mcenroe]

Kimberly, I abase myself before a fellow (sister) Defence reader. Is Military Technology still published? I can NOT find that in Los Angeles...

[kimberly]

Richard, full disclosure: haven't read Jane's for a couple of years and I never totally grooved on the hardware discussions (strategy's funner for me... I shoot guns but am doing well to clean them, don't ask me specs!) IOW, don't know about MT. While no doubt you have a million contacts and are a search engine savant, I'd be glad to give a look for it in the Republic of Texas and Confederacy of Georgia, if you'd like.

[richard mcenroe]

I shoot guns but am doing well to clean them, don't ask me specs!

Hey, as long as you remember to clear them before you toss them in the dryer...

[mojo]

"A sad day for American journalism"

Somewhere, Sam Fuller laughs cruelly...

[kimberly]

"before you toss them in the dryer"

Oh, please. Dishwasher works better, upper rack, less dinging.

[pellam]

I love how lefties love free speech for me but not for thee, how proper "civil discourse" for a conservative means servile intercourse with his betters.

[tas]

First note: Yeah, I'm probably trolling here. Second note: But I was attracted onto the blog via Dennis's ;atest Amanda post, where he's finally convinced me that she's a twit.

Anyways, perhaps Benen wants a TV pundit job, who knows. I imagine all bloggers at his level want a punditry gig. The leftward case against Erickson's sanity, though, isn't lacking.

Example #1: Some alarmingly violent rhetoric from Erickson about citizens taking up arms over laundry detergent.

Example #2: Erickson, on Twitter, calling former justice Souter a "goat fucking child molester"; for no apparent reason.

Regarding the second example, I was following Erickson on Twitter at the time, and called him out on these comments in a nice enough manner where he responded to me, and we exchanged a couple tweets about it and I got him to admit that he was a bit out of line. (If twitter had a decent archives engine, I'd display the tweet exchange.. If anybody cared.)

Sure, nobody watches CNN -- and Benen's a bit reactionary about this. But Erickson isn't a prime candidate to make conservatives look good, either.