Dennis the Peasant

Evidently Roger L. Simon Wants To Be The Sonny Tufts Of Journalism

It's the only explanation that makes any sense…

Those few hearty (and/or demented souls) who like to keep tabs on Pajamas Media have no doubt noticed that Da Raj has added a few new "journalists" the fold. Had the selection of said journalists been left in competent hands, such a move might have considered a step in the right direction. After all, it's hard to ignore the fact that Pajamas Media's present stable of commentators and journalists, from Roger Kimball straight through to Richard Miniter, seems intent on proving they can bore the paint off a Boeing 747 regardless of the chosen topic. Unfortunately for Aubrey Chernick's bank account, the key word in all of this was "competent"… And let's face it: Da Raj wouldn't be Da Raj if he didn't go out and fuck things up even more.

It seems beyond belief, but Roger L. Simon managed to go out into the journalistic wilderness, find, and then sign two of the most ridiculously half-assed pseudo-journalists available: Patrick Poole and Alyssa Lappen. Lappen is a "Senior Fellow" at Rachel Ehrenfeld's American Center for Democracy, and her shtick consists of "discovering" attempts to impose Shari'a Law on an unsuspecting Western Civilization (her particular shtick will be the Next Big Thing™ in Islamophobia, by the way). She's already put up a couple of mind-numbingly stupid posts over at Pajamas Media, and I fully intend on handing her her own ass soon, but today I want to concentrate on Moron Number Two: Central Ohio's own Patrick Poole.

As I've noted before, Patrick Poole is a freelance journalist and "Executive Director" of the non-existent Central Ohioans Against Terror, who lives in a suburb of Columbus. Patrick's shtick is "discovering" the inner Islamic terrorist in each and every Muslim living in Central Ohio. Apart from managing to get one long-time Somali-American citizen removed from a County advisory board, Poole's attempts at "Fighting locally against the global jihad" (his words, not mine) has met with little success. In these parts, at this time, Poole's regarded as a cross between a goof and a pest. And if you doubt my judgment, let's take a moment to juxtapose Patrick Poole's take on a recent bit of news with the take provided by the Columbus Dispatch…

From Central Ohioans Against Terror, January 2, 2008:

CAIR's Ahmad Al-Akhras set to flee the country for Dubai

It's official. As you heard it here first two weeks ago (after putting to bed the rampant rumors about his taking the open Ohio Civil Rights Commission post), CAIR national vice chairman and close advisor to Columbus Mayor Michael Coleman is set to follow the example of his friend, former Hilliard HAMAS cleric Salah Sultan, and flee the country for Dubai (Sultan fled to Bahrain). Be sure to revisit all our past coverage of Al-Akhras' antics.

We will miss you dearly, Ahmad.

It's worth noting that Poole, in a fit of Simon-esque inspiration, goes on to reproduce - in full - an email from Al-Akhras that directly contradicts the idea that Al-Akhras is "fleeing" the United States. Here's part of Al-Akhras' email:

I want to share with you that I accepted an international assignment in Dubai. After a long and thorough thinking and consultation, I decided that it is an opportunity that will allow me to share my expertise in the areas of transportation planning and traffic engineering. It is a very challenging prospect but I thought I can positively contribute so I took it.

Columbus will continue to be my home. I very much enjoyed working with many of you my dear brothers and sisters. It has been a great and rewarding experience. I hope that you continue supporting your great organizations in town.

I will be leaving soon. I will continue, however, to communicate with you during my, hopefully, short assignment abroad.

Now here is the article published by the Columbus Dispatch, January 3, 2008:

Islamic leader moving to Dubai Influential Ohioan worked for MORPC

A local and national leader of the Islamic community is leaving central Ohio for a top transportation job in the largest city in the United Arab Emirates.

Ahmad Al-Akhras steps down Friday as assistant transportation director at the Mid-Ohio Regional Planning Commission to become an advisor to the Dubai Roads and Transportation Authority. He leaves after 15 years with the regional planning commission.

Past president of the Ohio chapter of the Council on American-Islamic Relations, he said he'll still be vice chairman of the national CAIR board.

Al-Akhras, 45, finished his two-year term Monday as president of the Islamic Foundation of Central Ohio, the oldest Muslim organization in Columbus. He also resigned from the Community Refugees and Immigration Services of Ohio, the executive committee of the Ohio Conference of the NAACP and the Ohio ACLU board.

He has been an outspoken and sometimes controversial opponent of the war in Iraq, and "active on behalf of my community," he said.

Al-Akhras also stepped down from the Columbus Community Relations Commission and Columbus Streetcar Working Group and as chairman of the city's Transportation and Pedestrian Commission.
Al-Akhras holds master's and doctoral degrees in transportation and civil engineering from Ohio State University as well as bachelor's and master's degrees from the University of Jordan, the country where he grew up. He began working at MORPC in 1992.

Friends and colleagues recruited him for the Dubai job, he said. The transportation authority oversees marine, rail, public transit and roadway development and operations in the fast-growing region.

"The population was 1.4 million in 2006, from 1.1 million in 2005," he said. "Congestion is very prevalent there. In one year, they added 2,200 high-rise buildings. It's huge with the traffic it will generate."

A U.S. citizen, Al-Akhras said he'll keep his Columbus home and leave a son here.

"Columbus is home and will continue to be home," he said. "I would hope at one point to come back."

I don't know about you, but I have a feeling most normal folks who move from one place to another to accept a new job would object to the idea that they are "fleeing" anything. But our Patrick is anything but normal, and as one might expect, he has nothing but scorn for The Columbus Dispatch's brand of reporting:

UPDATE #1 (1/3/08): More than two weeks after we reported it here, the Columbus Dispatch today gives their friend Ahmad a polish job and a send-off. Way to keep up, guys.

However, there's a bit of a problem. Here's what Poole actually said two weeks ago…

Update #1 (0930 12/18/07): STOP THE PRESSES. Apparently the rumors about Al-Akhras possibly taking over the open OCRC post are NOT TRUE. Even more surprising than that, I'm informed that Al-Akhras intends to follow the example of his fellow jihadist, former Hilliard HAMAS cleric Salah Sultan, and is set to flee the country for the Middle East very shortly. More details are forthcoming.

Call me a nit-picker, but stating, "…I'm informed that Al-Akhras… is set to flee the country for the Middle East very shortly…" doesn't exactly equate to reporting that Al-Akhras had accepted a job in Dubai. And of course, calling Al-Akhras a "jihadist" is the sort of serious, objective reporting one expects from a professional journalist.

It's worth noting that for all of Poole's boasting, he's actually managed to get everything about this story completely wrong. Two weeks ago it was he, citing unnamed but completely reliable sources, who started the completely unreliable rumor that Al-Akhras was leaving MORPC to take a vacant seat on the Ohio Civil Rights Commission (and thus sending both Charles "The Poodle" Johnson of Little Green Footballs and Pamela "Pammycakes" Geller of Atlas Shrugs into fits of hysteria). It's amusing to see Poole's present take on that journalistic fiasco… Which is that he put "…to bed the rampant rumors about his taking the open Ohio Civil Rights Commission post…".

Evidently he's hoping nobody notices that he was "putting to bed" his own "rampant rumors".

It's also worth noting that Poole has a personal web site (Existential Space), and between it and Central Ohioans Against Terror, you can find out quite a bit about Roger L. Simon's newest Fearless Muslim Hunter™. For example, Poole is convinced he is being stalked, watched and/or monitored by CAIR, The Columbus Dispatch and the Nixon Center (I know… Don't ask, I haven't figured that one out, either). He also has a permit to carry a concealed weapon, and packs himself some serious heat because he's pretty sure he's on some sort of jihadi hit list…

Well, what can you say?

Other than of all the bozos on the internet, Roger L. Simon managed to find this one. And then gave him money and a platform to publish.

Unbelievable. Completely, totally, unbelievable.

Like I said, Da Raj seems intent on becoming the Sonny Tufts of Journalism…

To go with being the Sonny Tufts of Directing.

"You just wait, my remake of "Cat-Women of the Moon" will make everyone forget "Prague Duet"..."

Update: Unsurprisingly, over at Little Green Footballs Charles "The Poodle" Johnson links to Poole's post and decides that Al-Akhars' taking a new job in his chosen profession represents him "bailing out" on CAIR. Of course, had Johnson read the article in the Columbus Dispatch (that would be the one written by the professional journalist), he'd know that Al-Akhras was retaining his position with CAIR...

Great Moments In Internet Journalism: The December, 2007 Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Edition

Well, I've come up with yet another new feature here at Dennis The Peasant. Being as how I keep asking such inconvenient questions as, "Do you have any facts to support your conclusion?" and "Have you actually read the document you are discussing?" and "Do you have the faintest fucking idea of what the fuck you're talking about?", it seems logical that I should share some of my favorite moments in internet journalism for the month of December.

Why, you ask?

Because as we all know, New Media will be crushing the Mainstream Media any day now… Roger says so.

WINNER OF THE FRANKLIN FOER AWARD FOR ACCURACY IN JOURNALISM: Pamela "Pammycakes" Geller of Atlas Shrugs

Nothing screams "seriousness of purpose" like hawking your likeness on men's underwear and producing rambling, largely pointless YouTube videos as you blog, with increasing hysteria, about the End of Western Civilization As We Know It™. I guess this is what happens when you have a lot of money in your pockets, way too much time on your hands and don't know how to play mah-jongg.

Here's Pammycakes' hit parade for December:

November 29: Yes, I know November 29 isn't actually in the month of December, but I'm really getting into the spirit of things here. Anyway, back on November 29 Pammycakes put up a post about the guilty plea of a Rockville, Illinois man who planned to blow up a Rockville, Illinois shopping mall. Pammy's header:

Ohio Lone Jihadi Pleads Guilty

December 10: Pammycakes puts up a post about a YouTube video. The post is entitled The Right To Lie In Islam. Per Pammy:

In Shia Islam you can lie when advancing the cause of Islam as better [sic] explained by a Muslim scholar.

Interestingly enough, when you go to the YouTube page of this particular "Muslim scholar", one Obaid Karki, what one finds is that Mr. Karki isn't exactly claiming to be a Muslim scholar… Rather, one finds that Mr. Karki sees himself as an…

Independant [sic] Street-Knowledge Talkshow Guru. Unaffiliated to A State, Organized Religion, Sect or Kin. Anti Tribal Gentile.

And if that isn't enough, he's also a…

Spinoziste Pantheon Urban Automath Hexalingual 150 Pages per Hour. Self-taught oneself without formal instruction or help of others with an enthusiasm for self-education and a high degree of self-motivation to debate.

As noted, Mr. Karki doesn't make mention of any scholarly training in things Islamic, although his professed enjoyment of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Australian Rules Football makes it obvious that he's spent quite a bit of time in the local madrassa.

December 16: Pammy posts CAIR's Al-Akhras to head Ohio Civil Rights Commission? Here's the sort of sophisticated analysis that's made Geller what she is today:

More submission. More sharia. More more more for Islam, less less less America. Patrick Poole exposes the dirt on the latest skulduggery [sic] in Ohio.

Unfortunately for Pammycakes, there were two minor problems… No dirt and no skullduggery. Pseudo-journalist Patrick Poole posted a "rumor" (his choice of words, not mine) on his web site claiming that Gov. Strickland was going to name Al-Akhras to head the Ohio Civil Rights Commission. The rumor was based on "information" (my choice of words, not his) from an "unnamed source" close to the "situation". On December 18, Poole retracted the entire thing. Pamela must have missed that part, because in original, uncorrected post is still up at Atlas Shrugs.

Yeah, I'm surprised, too.

WINNER OF THE 'DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN' AWARD FOR "OOPS, I JUMPED THE GUN" JOURNALISM: Patrick Poole of Central Ohioans Against Terrorism (and Pajamas Media)

Patrick Poole is a free-lance writer who spends a lot of time writing about The Muslim Menace™ here in Central Ohio. As nobody in Central Ohio will give him the time of day, he ends up getting published by the likes of David Horowitz (Front Page Magazine) and Roger L. Simon (Pajamas Media). Need I say more?

December 16: As mentioned above, Patrick Poole posts a "rumor" that Ohio's governor is going to appoint a "radical" Muslim (is there any other kind?) to head the Ohio Civil Rights Commission, based on information provided by a "reliable" but unnamed source.

December 18: Poole publishes a retraction, saying the information from his reliable but unnamed source turned out to be, well, unreliable.

WINNER OF THE DAN RATHER RELENTLESS PURSUIT OF TRUTH AWARD IN JOURNALISM: Charles "The Poodle" Johnson of Little Green Footballs (and newly ex-Pajamas Media)

December 16: Charles "The Poodle" Johnson takes a short break from vilifying Gates of Vienna for publishing inaccurate information about an obscure Flemish political party to publish Patrick Poole's rumor about Muslims taking over the Ohio Civil Rights Commission. To date, Johnson's post has not been removed or corrected at Little Green Footballs.

WINNER OF THE TOM FRIEDMAN AWARD FOR THE BIGGEST JOURNALISTIC BLUFF REGARDING KNOWLEDGE OF THE SUBJECT BEING DISCUSSED: Glenn "Glenn Harlan" Reynolds of Instapundit.

Glenn demonstrates what we non-lawyers already knew: Lawyers know everything about everything.

December 24: Glenn Harlan posts the following…

THIS SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT: "If a nuclear war between Israel and Iran were to break out 16-20 million Iranians would lose their lives - as opposed to 200,000-800,000 Israelis, according to a report recently published by the Washington-based Center for Strategic and International Studies."

Unfortunately, as Glenn fails to provide us a copy his own study of casualties in an Israeli-Iranian nuclear conflict, we'll just have to take his word for it. I'm told that next week he tells us Einstein's Theory of Relativity sounds "about right".

HONORABLE MENTION: THE FRANKLIN FOER AWARD FOR ACCURACY IN JOURNALISM: Baron Bodissey and Dymphna of Gates of Vienna (part of the Pajamas Media network)

Remember, somewhere along the way, Roger L. Simon, Charles Johnson and Glenn Reynolds looked at Gates of Vienna and said, "Gee, this is the sort of first-rate blogging we want for our tipping-point, opinion-leading audience. Let's give them money…"

December 17: The Baron posts Sharia Financing In Minneapolis?, and based on the musings of noted expert on all things Islamic and financial, James Lileks, decides the City of Minneapolis is unconstitutionally discriminating against non-Muslims by offering Sharia-compliant lusiness development loans to Muslims.

December 19: Half-assed Ohio C.P.A. and D-list blogger Dennis The Peasant takes roughly one hour to read up on Sharia finance and the various available City of Minneapolis business development loan programs and then writes a post demonstrating conclusively that neither James Lileks nor Baron Bodissey were close to understanding what a Sharia-compliant loan is, as well as pointing out that neither had bothered to actually check the City of Minneapolis' web site and read the description of the loan program in question. Other than the fact that the loans weren't no-cost and were available to both Muslims and non-Muslims, the reporting of Lileks and The Baron is flawless.

December 19: Gates of Vienna blogger Dymphna posts Mr. Peasant is Disgusted by Our Ignorance, which, quite lightheartedly, reproduces my post regarding Sharia Financing In Minneapolis? in full… and without acknowledging or correcting Baron Bodissey's errors. Lileks is too busy pondering Gnat to post anything regarding the loan scandal he uncovered.

December 19: Baron Bodissey notes the murder in Sweden of Professor Fuat Deniz by persons unknown. Despite reporting that the Swedish police have neither leads nor motive, the Baron opines that it must have been the work of Turkish Muslims because Deniz was working on a book about Ottoman genocide of Assyrian Christians. Additionally, and without any additional information to support his claim, Baron Bodissey continues to write posts suggesting "the Turks" are responsible for the murder to this very date.

THE HUNTER S. THOMPSON GRAND PRIZE AWARD FOR FEARLESS INVESTIGATIVE REPORTING BY A JOURNALIST NOT PRESENTLY UNDER PSYCHIATRIC CARE: Annie Jacobsen of Pajamas Media

In the tradition of Michael Ledeen's pronouncement that Ayatollah ali Khamenei was dead (which came, no doubt, as a shock to the Ayatollah) and Philippe Karsenty's pronouncement that Fidel Castro was dead (which came, no doubt, as a shock to ol' Fidel), I give you the wondrous reportings of Annie Jacobsen… With the appropriately hilarious set-up by the geniuses at Pajamas Media.

Five crop-duster planes have crashed on the terror-plagued island of Mindanao in a short period of time. Annie Jacobsen says that while it may feel like Mindanao is half a world away, the island’s plantations are linked to the international food supply chain. Is it time to start worrying about what’s being sprayed on your bananas?

What red-blooded, true-blue American hasn't worried about the state of their bananas? Anyway…

December 21: Jacobsen posts Is Terrorism Behind [The] Mysterious Crop-Duster Crashes In [The] Philippines? on Pajamas Media's web site. In said post Jacobsen speculates, without a shred of evidence to support such speculation, that five separate crashes of crop dusting planes on the island of Mindanao could be linked to The Muslim Menace™. How they are linked to said Muslim Menace™ isn't explained, but one would have to conclude that Jacobsen is suggesting that Filipino Muslims are sabotaging the island's crop-dusters so they can bring in terrorist crop-dusters to poison the banana crop with terrorist crop-dusting poisons. How they are supposed to pull this off isn't elaborated upon. Nor is how the poisoned bananas are supposed to elude detection prior to being consumed by whomever consumes the Filipino bananas mentioned. My favorite moment? Try this…

Here’s a rundown on the Mindanao Island crop-duster crashes as they were reported in newspapers in South East Asia, China, and the Middle East.

[snip]

Also on November 19, 2007, 8:00 a.m: Both Cebu City News and Asian Journal Online report that two crop-dusters collided midair in the remote village of Kapalong.

[T]wo crop-duster aircraft collided in mid-air, killing one of pilot and seriously injuring the other, said Chief Superintendent Atilano Morada, director of the Aviation Secretary Group, in a phone interview. Frederick San Felix, Davao area manager of Air Transportation Office (ATO), said the two spray planes collided while spraying chemicals on the banana plantation of Alberto M. Soriano in the village of Maniki in Kapalong town at past 8 a.m.

How did the terrorists manage to get two crop-dusting aircraft to collide in mid-air? Hey, it wouldn't be The Muslim Menace™ if we knew that, now would it?. Anyway, Anne goes on to state, portentously…

The world’s banana consumer would be wise to wonder, what’s being sprayed on my banana?

I intend to ask Muffy that very question this very evening. I'll let you know how it works out.

Evidently I'm Not The Only One Getting Right Wing Love…

This is one of those "What the fuck?" moments that seem to come with increasing frequency from the VRWC side of the political blogosphere. You may or may not know who Moxie is, and you may or may not know who Captain Ed (Ed Morrissey) is, but if you've got a brain in your head you've got to be wondering if Captain Ed graduated at the top of his class at the Roger L. Simon School of Advanced Business Ethics, or if he's just your garden variety moron. Here's the story, as related by Steve H. Graham:

I think I'll start the ball rolling by mentioning something. Moxie has a Nowlive show. She used to have a Blogtalkradio show. I had one, too. We were both featured hosts, but then our featured status was revoked without notice, and she moved to Nowlive, and I followed. Since then she has developed a big following over there, and she has made a lot of connections. It's not the big time, but she's making good media connections, and it has taken a lot of work to grow her audience and so on.

The other day, she got an email from Ed, the guy who runs Captain's Quarters. I forget his last name. He's in charge of political programming at BTR. He told her Fox News had asked BTR to recommend someone for some kind of on-air gig. He asked if she would go back to BTR if he submitted her name to Fox.

Now I have no idea what Ed Morrissey did for a living before he started working for BlogTalkRadio, but whatever it was it most probably involved frequent use of a phase similar to, "Would you like fries with that?" He certainly wasn't involved in any sort of real, honest to gosh, actual profession… That's for damn sure.

I'm a certified public accountant, and as such I am the member of a real profession. When I am approached by anyone looking for professional help - either from a C.P.A., a lawyer, an insurance agent, a banker… whatever - I refer them to the professional most appropriate to their needs that is known to me. That's what you do when you're a professional, and you do it without first pausing to consider, "What's in it for me?" A large part of being a professional is having the personal integrity to put self-interest on the back burner when it comes to making referrals.

So when it comes to dealing with people, what a professional does not do is make referrals or utilize connections contingent on personal gain. I have a stable of professionals I refer people to, and those professionals have earned those referrals because they've earned my trust. I know that they'll provide competent services.

And understand that not all of these professionals are buddies of mine. I routinely refer people to two C.P.A.s in town that I have had a serious falling-out with on the personal side of things. (I'm sure you'll find it surprising, but very often Dennis doesn't play well with others.) One of them I haven't spoken to in over 10 years. But the bottom line is he's one hell of a tax accountant, and for someone who needs serious, sophisticated tax work, he's who I'd trust to get it right. Therefore, he gets the referral... Because getting it right as all that really matters.

The point here is that if Ed Morrissey was worth a shit - and it's clear he isn't - he'd have never even considered hitting Moxie with such a proposal. Even if one disregards just how unprofessional it was, how could Moxie see it as anything other than an insult? It's basically nothing more than the old casting couch routine. Here's more from Steve:

Now, think about that for a minute. BTR and Captain Ed did nothing for her when she had a show there. She had to leave and work up a following on another site. Then Captain Ed shows up and says, "Throw all that down the toilet, piss off everyone you know at Nowlive, wreck the connections you've made there, start over with nothing, and we'll put you on a list of names some intern at Fox News is making." Never mind that Moxie knows people at Fox and could get herself on the list, with no sacrifice, by making two phone calls. Getting your name put on a list is not hard and it's not really a big move forward.

…

What kind of moron would have taken that offer? It's like saying, "Give up your apartment, and we'll give you a raffle ticket so you can have a chance at winning a house." It's a stupid, stupid move. Ed knows that.

Actually, I think Steve is giving Morrissey the benefit of the doubt. If he wasn't a moron, he'd have never done what he did in the first place. As proof, here's how Captain Ed finished out his offer to Moxie:

Here is what I told her, and if you think it makes me an evil Svengali, let me point out that every other intelligent person she knows said the same thing. I told her to tell Ed--politely--"I can't give up what I have for nothing, but if I get the Fox gig, I'll commit to do BTR for X months." She says she did something much like that, and he never replied.

Never. Even. Answered.

That's not only being stupid and unprofessional, that's being a flat-out counterproductive. Clearly Ed Morrissey doesn't have the sort of background to know how to act appropriately when it came to trying to entice Moxie into returning to BlogTalkRadio. And because he didn't know what was appropriate, he came off acting like a horse's ass. Instead of using the Fox list as an opportunity to sow a bit of goodwill and enhance BlogTalkRadio's prestige with someone they want back in their tent, Morrissey makes himself a personal enemy while simultaneously presenting his employer in the worst possible light. Unfortunately, that seems to be the way blogosphere Conservatives and Republicans carry themselves these days

If there has been one consistent thread linking the efforts of the Conservative/Republican to grow itself, its that the people involved simply don't know what they are doing. Period. One need look no further than the God-awfulness of Pajamas Media, the silliness of PorkBusters, and the flat-out embarrassment that is One Billion Bulbs to understand that the Right Wing's talent pool is very, very shallow. Whatever you might think of Markos Moulitsas' politics, the fact is that he has created a huge online community that, in and of itself, outstrips all similar Conservative/Republican efforts combined by simply working smart and working hard. That his web site design is a thing of genius is undeniable, but do we have any Conservative/Republican bloggers attempting to replicate DailyKOS for our political ends? Of course not.

Why is that?

Well, it's worth noting that many on the Conservative/Republican side of the blogosphere are hucksters, plain and simple. It's difficult to get hard work out of this sort of person. One look at the resumes of the likes of David Horowitz and Roger L. Simon and what you see are men far more interested in turning a quick buck than anything else. Both were "committed" Leftists when it was profitable to be so, and both switched sides when they saw an opportunity to extend the half-life of their influence (and careers). It would never occur to a Horowitz or a Simon to try to build a DailyKOS… A project like DailyKOS would be too much work for the monetary return involved. Additionally, it wouldn't be the sort of thing one could sell to, say, Microsoft for a cool hundred million or so. And it certainly would never occur to either Horowitz or Simon that much of the value of DailyKOS is what it provides Progressive, Liberals and Democrats in terms of a sense of community for their movement.

If it doesn't translate into profit, it just doesn't compute.

Beyond this sort of pure con men, though, there lies a legion of opportunists… A legion that runs the gamut from hot shots like Michelle Malkin to nobodys like Patrick Poole. For the Michelle Malkins of the world, all that really matters is Michelle Malkin. She's discovered a shtick that works, and she'll work it until the day she dies… in no small part because she simply isn't bright enough to move beyond it. In that respect, she's just like Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter: What you hear today is what you're going to hear ten years from now, irrespective of whether it makes sense or not. And because of that, folks like Malkin (and Coulter) are more than happy to set Conservatism and the Republican Party's interests back twenty years when policy doesn't conform to the shtick.

And if it is difficult trying to get a hard day's work out of Roger L. Simon, imagine the difficulties in attempting to get a day of smart work out of someone like Pam Geller. For people like Geller, and Debbie Schlussel, and Patrick Poole... well, they are simply second-raters enamored of the idea of using present circumstances - as well as prevailing prejudices - to carve themselves a new, more lucrative career by catering to the lowest possible denominator. They have no time to devote to broader interests because it is imperative that they do whatever it takes to be noticed. In today's climate, that seems to translate into bigotry and paranoia on a truly outlandish scale.

It takes only one quick look at these people to understand that the Conservative movement and the Republican party are means to a far smaller, and far more tawdry, end than a Markos Moulitsas could ever imagine. Given the people and the motivations involved, is it any wonder that we have no real leadership emerging from the ranks?

Of course not.

Steve sums it up best:

After Moxie sent her response, why didn't Ed follow up? She made him a good offer; the best offer a reasonable person could have made. I would have written back and said, "I completely understand that you don't want to lose what you have. I'll put you on the list, and I hope it works out." No, I wouldn't even have done THAT. I would have put her in contact with Fox from the get-go.

Hey, maybe he's working furiously behind the scenes, trying to get her the job. Maybe I'm completely wrong. But I doubt it. My money is on pettiness and a lack of vision and professionalism. Because those are defining characteristics of the conservative media. They are why we lose and why we will always lose.

Can You Guess Why James Lileks and Gates of Vienna Are Alike? Sure You Can...

Well, when it comes to Sharia finance, neither of them have a fuckin' clue. That's one reason.

And neither seem to understand the value of fact-checking. That's another.

Not that a couple of details like those would stop either of them from spouting on the subject, mind you.

From the noted counterjihadist Baron Bodissey's Sharia Financing in Minneapolis? at Gates of Vienna:

Thanks to the alertness of James Lileks, we now know that Sharia finance - loans made without interest, as prescribed by Islamic law - is being officially promoted by the mayor of Minneapolis.

And as the Baron goes on to note, Lileks is outraged:

Unless no-interest business loans are available to religious believers whose doctrines do not forbid interest — not to mention anarchists — this would seem to be Flamingly Unconstitutional, to use the legal term. Does one have to prove one holds this particular religious belief? Would they bring in someone to test you? It seems absurd to expect the government to validate your piety to make sure you qualify for benefits.

And since Lileks is outraged, Herr Baron decides he'd better get outraged as well:

Sharia-based finance is rapidly gaining ground in the United States. The most effective means to combat it is to denounce it vigorously, loudly, and repeatedly as blatantly unconstitutional.

It's pretty clear from what both Lileks and Baron Bodissey have written that they are assuming that Sharia financing equates to "no cost" financing. They both assume that "no interest" financing means that Muslims will have the use of these city monies free of charge. And, just to make sure we understand the situation, they both clearly assume that such "no interest, no cost" financing will provide an unfair (or "unconstitutional", as they both so charmingly assert) competitive advantage to the business interests of The Muslim Menace™.

There's only one problem with this: They're both dead wrong.

Had either James Lileks or Baron Bodissey googled "Sharia finance" and spent, say, twenty minutes reading several of the many links provided on page one, our intrepid journalist and our equally intrepid counterjihadist would have discovered that "no interest" Sharia finance does not equate to "no cost" non-Sharia finance, and that both of them were completely, totally and embarrassingly wrong in their respective hyperventilations. But as we all know, saving the world from The Muslim Menace™ can really eat into your free time if you let it, so sometimes something has to give… In this case, as in most, what actually does give is any semblance to factual accuracy.

I now understand why Lileks was so desperate to avoid returning to reporting news for a living.

Here are the facts:

Islamic law requires three elements to be present in any financial contract to qualify as Sharia-compliant:

1) All parties share in the profits and losses associated with the transaction,
2) Investors in the transaction cannot charge interest, and
3) Uncertainty (returns determined by possible future outcomes) is prohibited in the terms of the contract.

(Other elements, such as prohibited investments (haram) and form/elements of Sharia-compliant contracts need not be addressed here.)

The key to understanding Sharia financing is this: Muslims believe that money, in and of itself, has no value. All value derives from trading, and the risk associated with trading. Therefore, making money from money is prohibited because it is viewed as being a risk-free transaction with unearned reward. So, for any transaction to meet the requirements of Sharia financing, it must be structured in a way that risk and reward are fairly shared by all parties to the contract. Thus, where the Western investor would receive interest income, the Muslim investor would receive a stated portion of the profit or loss. Where the Western borrower would pay interest, the Muslim would pay a stated portion of the profits (if any) of the transaction.

The bottom line is this: When the mayor of Minneapolis stated that the city would make available "alternative financing loans with no interest to business owners whose religious beliefs restrict them from receiving traditional interest-based financing", what he was not saying was the Muslim business owners would receive "no cost" loans. What he was saying is that they would be receiving traditional Islamic financing where profit-sharing is substituted for the paying of interest. Not that either Lileks or the Baron would know this, but what the city will most likely offering is a Murabaha contract, which Westerners usually consider to be a form of cost-plus financing, through a third-party agent.

In any event, it's clear that neither James Lileks, professional journalist, nor Baron Bodissey, fearless counterjihadist (whatever the fuck that is) could be bothered with getting their facts straight before wailing the wail of impending doom before the sinister forces of The Muslim Menace™. Then again, as neither Lileks nor the Baron have any grounding in Sharia law, banking systems or international finance, it's completely understandable that they'd fuck this story up from top to bottom. After all, these are men who are far more interested in stoking the wellsprings of their own paranoia than actually coming to an understanding what actually does, or does not, constitute a credible threat to either themselves or us.

In other words, they're Pudknockers. And that's the primary reason why these two are alike…

An Aside: I find it amazing that someone (the Baron) who co-authors a blog on the apolcalyptic threat that is Islam doesn't have the faintest idea of what constitutes Islamic finance. Makes you wonder just how much he knows about anything else connected with Islam, doesn't it? And I don't know about you, but knowing he couldn't tell Sharia finance from the South of France doesn't exactly inspire any confidence in moi that he's gonna get The Muslim Menace™ under control any time soon, either.

Another Aside: Two test questions: Anyone want to guess how many U.S. companies doing business abroad are using Sharia-compliant financial instruments on a routine basis? Anyone want to guess how long many of these companies have been using said instruments? If your answers aren't "thousands" and "decades", you just flunked the test. So by all means, get all flustered about the threat of Sharia finance...

A Note To My Friends At GulfCoastPundit: I see I have several folks claiming my assertion that the Sharia financing offered by the City of Minneapolis isn't "no cost" is just an example of me running my mouth. Sorry, kids, but Dennis - unlike Lileks and the Baron - actually does his fucking homework. Here is a link to the City of Minneapolis web site page that explains the Sharia finance program in detail. It is "low cost", not "no cost", and mirrors the City of Minneapolis' non-Sharia 2% Revolving Loan funding that is available to dhimmis. Remember this: What I'm interested in is facts, so before you accuse me of not doing my homework, make sure you've done yours. I smoked Michelle Malkin's, Charles Johnson's, Markos Moulitsas', Duncan Black's, Josh Marshall's and Ed Morrissey's asses over Dubai Ports World... I'll be more than happy to smoke yours over this.

Yet Another Aside: I brings a tear to my eye to note, with relief, that my old pal James Wolcott has linked to me one more time. It's been so, so long. I'd come to the conclusion he'd tossed me aside for another bad-tempered, foul-mouthed ex-neo-con...

Another In A Series Of Asides: AM I THE ONLY PERSON IN THE BLOGOSPHERE WHO UNDERSTANDS THE CONCEPT OF FACT-CHECKING?

I see one of Gates of Vienna's dimwit commenters has come up with a truly substantive criticism of ol' Dennis, and that one of the commenters at Gulf Coast Pundit has picked it up and repeated it as if it were gospel. Here it is:

I haven't looked at Dennis the Unpleasant's blog for a while, but I recall him gloating that his numerous muslim Somali clents know him as 'Mr. Green' on account of the large number of greenbucks that the Peasant manages to extract from the US government and other agencies on their behalf.

IOW a really principled individual.

Dumb motherfuckers.

Here's what I actually wrote:

I’ve even acquired a nickname: I’m “Mr. Green”, because I’m the guy who writes the checks...

The link to my post is here. It's worth noting that nowhere in that post, or any other, do I claim to be helping the Somalis acquire funding. There's a reason for that: I don't do grant-writing. Never have. Never will. All of the funding the Somali Community Assocation had during my association with them (Federal, Franklin County and City of Columbus) was in place prior to my hiring.

What I was talking about, and what is abundantly clear in my post, is that I physically prepared their checks... their payroll checks. That's why I was "Mr. Green". So what we have here is some guy who doesn't like what I've written about Lileks and the Baron deciding to damn me for something he half-remembered (incorrectly) I wrote, and another guy who didn't like what I wrote about Lileks and the Baron picking it up and repeating it. Without checking. Without verifying. Good job, both of you... It's just about what I would have expected from a couple of dumb motherfuckers: Failing to fact-check your criticism of someone checking facts to prove you don't know what you're talking about. Guess you showed me.

Pajamas Media's Pudknockin' Patrick Poole Gets It All Wrong...

As we mentioned yesterday in our Hey, I'm A Terrorist post, the fearless Pajamas Media "investigative reporter" and Executive Director of the yet-to-be-actually-incorporated "Central Ohioans Against Terrorism", Mr. Patrick Poole, had yet to actually present a verified fact related to his breathless suggestion that Ohio Gov. Ted Strickland was about to nominate a Muslim [insert collective gasp of horror here] to head the Ohio Civil Rights Commission. Well, times have changed. Here's Mr. Poole's one verified fact:

Update #1 (0930 12/18/07): STOP THE PRESSES. Apparently the rumors about Al-Akhras possibly taking over the open OCRC post are NOT TRUE.

Poole goes on to state the following:

Even more surprising than that, I'm informed that Al-Akhras intends to follow the example of his fellow jihadist, former Hilliard HAMAS cleric Salah Sultan, and is set to flee the country for the Middle East very shortly. More details are forthcoming.

Which, given Poole's track record, will probably amount to Al-Akhras vacationing in South Dakota sometime in 2009.

Note: I'm sure this will come as a complete shock... Neither Charles "The Poodle" Johnson at Little Green Footballs, nor Pamela "Pammycakes" Geller of Atlas Shrugs has issued corrections to their posts citing Poole's reporting as evidence of The Muslim Menace™ engulfing Ohio. And these morons wonder why people like me don't take them seriously...

Hey, I'm A Terrorist!

Morons.

That's about the nicest thing you can say about them.

To listen to them, you'd think it was time for me to be picking out a couple of fashionable burkhas for Muffy.

From Little Green Footballs: CAIR Infiltrating Ohio Civil Rights Commission?

From Atlas Shrugs: CAIR's Al-Akhras to head Ohio Civil Rights Commission?

Oh! My! God! (er, Allah!?)

From Pammycakes… the very same Pammycakes who was unable (and is still unable) to differentiate a "Muslim scholar" and an "…Independant (sic) Street-Knowledge Talkshow Guru... Unaffiliated to A State, Organized Religion, Sect or Kin… Anti Tribal Gentile…":

More submission. More sharia. More more more for Islam, less less less America. Patrick Poole exposes the dirt on the latest skulduggery (sic) in Ohio.

Horrors!

Trials and tribulations!

Increased anxiety!

Wait a second…

When you actually read the article that brings forth the above anguished cries of alarum from The Poodle and Pammycakes, what you get from the author, one Patrick Poole, is the following:

It is currently nothing but rumor, but there may be a thus-far unmentioned possible replacement for Barbara Sykes as the head of the Ohio Civil Rights Commission - CAIR national vice chairman and local Islamic extremist leader Ahmad Al-Akhras.

Nothing but a rumor?

According to a very reliable inside source, Al-Akhras resigned later in the week from his longtime cushy, high-paying job as assistant director of transportation at the Mid Ohio Regional Planning Commission (MORPC).

Nothing but a rumor based on something that might have happened according to unnamed source?

Oh, and that would have been last week. As of Monday afternoon this week, Poole has yet to confirm the resignation.

I previously reported ("Ahmad Al-Akhras on the Ropes?") that Al-Akhras' situation at MORPC was tentative already as many there grew tired of his constant on-the-clock activism and outspoken extremism, though no one could address for fear of the full "Wrath of CAIR" and the obligatory religious discrimination lawsuit that would have followed.

Here's what Poole previously reported:

According to a very reliable source, as a result of my FrontPage exposé several weeks ago, "Hometown Jihad: Getting By with a Little Help from His (Terrorist) Friends", CAIR-National vice chairman Ahmad Al-Akhras is on his way out of his long-time cushy government job with the Mid-Ohio Regional Planning Commission (MORPC), where Al-Akhras is currently assistant director of transportation. Until my article, his MORPC employers were not aware of his close friendships with Al-Qaeda, Palestinian Islamic Jihad, Islamic Courts Union and Muslim Brotherhood terrorists and operatives or his pro-HAMAS and pro-Hezbollah rallys (sic) he has regularly staged here in town.

Apparently things are so bad that not even his good friend, Mayor Michael Coleman, can apparently save him (but Coleman may still keep him on the Community Relations Commission and the Street Car Working Group).

That was written on July 30. If Mr. Terror-monger is on his way out, it seems to be at a rather leisurely pace…

But enough of that, back to Patrick Poole on the whole Ohio Civil Rights Commission thingy…

I previously reported that Al-Akhras' situation at MORPC was tentative already as many there grew tired of his constant on-the-clock activism and outspoken extremism, though no one could address for fear of the full "Wrath of CAIR" and the obligatory religious discrimination lawsuit that would have followed.

Mr. Poole's source? A "very reliable source". A very reliable unnamed source. He continues…

From one perspective (certainly not mine, by the way), Al-Akhras is an attractive candidate for the Ohio Civil Rights Commission (OCRC) job. Al-Akhras has long been Columbus Mayor Michael Coleman's man on the Community Relations Commission, and he is also a board member of ACLU-OH and the NAACP-OH. Al-Akhras has also participated in forums sponsored by the OCRC, such as this "Voting Rights Forum" in February 2006, which he moderated.

Wow. He's a civic-minded terror-monger, this al-Akhras. And…

He's tight with Gov. Ted Strickland, and it is no secret that our network of Islamic extremists here in town, headed by Al-Akhras, have not been happy with not having one of their own on the OCRC. In obeisance for their public support and campaign fundraising on his behalf, Strickland appeared at the CAIR-OH annual banquest (sic) last June. They may be demanding more political payback from him…

Of course. Our governor, who is, after all, a Democrat, is clearly a full-fledged dhimmi and terror-monger enabler. Just like the mayor of Columbus, who is, after all, a Democrat, is also clearly a dhimmi and terror-monger enabler as well!

How could we be so blind and not see?

I really don't know too much about Ahmad Al-Akhras. From what I've been able to find out, he doesn't seem to be my kind of guy, if you know what I mean. But there is a crucial distinction that needs to be made here that Patrick Poole avoids… Ahmad Al-Akhras has a perfect right to say what he's said, and associate with whom he's associated with, irrespective of how distasteful both his views and his friends might be to you and I.

Beyond that, let's make sure we are real clear about what Patrick Poole is doing here. He's using an "unnamed source" as a vehicle to launch into a bit of unfettered speculation that has yet to be backed by one iota of verifiable fact. And while we're at it, let's be real clear about what The Poodle and Pammycakes are doing here… They're linking to undocumented, unverified speculation to push their shared personal obsession as fact. What does that remind you of? The sort of journalism you'd expect from Dan Rather, perhaps?

An aside: Ever notice that according to people like The Poodle and Pammycakes the only place in the world where the Muslim Menace™ is losing is in Iraq? Makes you wonder when Pammycakes is gonna pack her bikinis and her kids and move to Baghdad, doesn't it?

Anyway, what makes this all the worse is they're quoting Patrick Poole. Poole hails from Hilliard, which is a suburb just north of Columbus (as Westerville is). He has variously described himself as a "human rights writer and activist", a "counter-terror consultant" and the "Executive Director of Central Ohioan Against Terrorism". In more prosaic terms, one might describe him as a free-lance writer. His background, from what I've been able to gather, is rather vaguely summed-up by this bit of biography he provided one organization:

Patrick Poole is a freelance writer and political analyst with experience in both the business and public policy arenas. As Vice President for International Development of an Alabama-based company, he was responsible for managing projects in Eastern Europe, Latin America and Southeastern Asia. He has also served as public policy analyst for organizations in Washington DC and several state capitals.

Probably all you really need to know about him is that he's a regular contributor to David Horowitz' Front Page Magazine and has recently joined - wait for it - Pajamas Media as an "investigative reporter". As you would expect, it appears Poole has absolutely no academic qualifications or professional experience in Islamic studies, Middle Eastern history or politics, nor any training or experience in dealing with terrorism. He's a former businessman who had done business in a number of places overseas - although not in the Middle East. Nonetheless, Poole managed to figure out - all by himself, no less -that Central Ohio (and especially Hilliard) is "… a center for jihad - one of the hottest centers of jihad in the country…" and that these jihadists are, without exception, being shielded and enabled by state and local officeholders exclusively aligned with the Democratic Party!

Amazing how that works…

Poole's modus operandi in Central Ohio has been to select the most prominent Central Ohio Muslims he can find and then "prove" they are radicals, extremists and/or jihadis by playing "connect the dots". He selects Muslim A for "the treatment". He then notes that Muslim A knows, or at least has met, Muslim B. Muslim B knows, or has met Muslim C. Muslim C has either joined a perfectly legal advocacy organization (for example, CAIR) or made some sort of perfectly legal public statement (for example, supporting Palestinian statehood). This is proof - at least to Poole - that Muslim C is a Muslim radical, extremist and/or jihadi. Since Muslim B knows Muslim C, Muslim B must also be a radical, extremist and/or jihadi. And… since Muslim A knows Muslim B, Muslim A must also be a radical, extremist and/or jihadi.

You'd think, coming on the heels of the uncovering of the bomb plot by an al-Qaeda cell, that Central Ohioans would be paying attention to Mr. Poole, wouldn't you? Well, if you've made that assumption you'd be largely wrong. And if you thought being the "Executive Director of Central Ohioans Against Terror" was a big deal, you'd also be largely wrong. Poole's been largely ignored (to the extent that he isn't considered a pest, that is), and the last time I checked the Secretary of State's web site, there is no "Central Ohioans Against Terror" incorporated in this state...

That means that "Central Ohioans Against Terror" exists solely in the mind of one Patrick Poole of Hilliard, Ohio.

It also means he's basically a pudknocker who's hustling Islamophobia for fun and profit.

Oh, and as for the title of this post, I decided to use Poole's method of ferreting out terrorists on my own true self and see where it went. Here's the results:

1) Dennis The Peasant was once the C.P.A. for the Somali Community Association of Ohio, Inc.
2) He knew the Executive Director of that organization.
3) The Executive Director knew convicted would-be bomber Nuradin Abdi.
4) The Executive Director introduced Nuradin Abdi to Dennis The Peasant (supposedly… I don't remember).
5) Dennis The Peasant wrote several posts on his web site condemning anti-Muslim bigotry.
6) Several of which were linked to and/or republished by James Wolcott of Vanity Fair.
7) So, Dennis The Peasant has met a convicted terrorist,
8) And, made public statements sympathetic towards Muslims…
9) THEREFORE, Dennis The Peasant must be a radical, extremist and/or jihadi!
10) I.E., a terrorist.

Just think about it... I'd have never figured out I was a terrorist without Patrick Poole! Amazing!

And The Poodle and Pammycakes? They'd have never have figured out Ohio was becoming the first Muslim state of the Union without Patrick either!

What a guy!

Saving Western Civilization: The Peoples Front of Judea Gets Down To Serious Business…

More from the Department of Unintentional Hilarity Department: Gates of Vienna Section…

OK, now that they've quit yelling "Run away!" and retreated from Castle Johnson, and now that they've upgraded the counterjihad movement's news aggregation capabilities by suggesting it substitute Atlas Shrugs for Little Green Footballs, Baron Bodissey and Dymphna get down to the serious business of getting their comments section under control:

I have closed two threads to comments and deleted as many of the outright rule-breakers as I could find. These threads had degenerated into name-calling and other vile behavior.

This is very unfortunate, because our comment threads used to be havens of lucidity and rational discussion, even when the topic was contentious. Nastiness like this drives away serious thinkers who want to have a calm discussion.

Gates of Vienna is expansive in its treatment of comments, but we do have rules. To recapitulate: comments must be civil, temperate, on-topic, and show decorum.

In more detail:
1. Civil: No name calling, gratuitous insults, personal slurs, denigration of someone’s intelligence, etc.
2. Temperate: No exhortations to commit violence or foment insurrection, or slaughter, or maim, etc.
3. On-topic: We generally don’t delete off-topic comments, but reserve the right to if they are excessively long. A brief OT mention of something you think we should know is perfectly fine.
4. Decorum: We are a PG-13 blog, because the parents of homeschoolers allow their older children to come over here to further their education. Please make your point without resort to foul language or explicit descriptions.

Name-calling violates #1.

Advocating murder violates #2.

Racial epithets violate #1 and sometimes #4.

I'm glad to see they're taking such a strong stand against exhortations to commit violence, or foment insurrection, or slaughter, or maim, etc….

I especially like the fact that the Baron has to spell out that advocating murder doesn't qualify as being "temperate".

The Battle to Save Western Civilization: The Peoples Front of Judea vs. The Judean Peoples Front Edition

About two weeks ago I noted that Charles Johnson had parted ways with Pajamas Media, and at that time I speculated that it may have been due to the full-scale blog war that had erupted between Little Green Footballs and Gates of Vienna over the merits of a somewhat obscure Flemish political party. Following up on that development, last week I went on to note that the intra-"counterjihad" war appeared to be escalating, and the proprietors of Gates of Vienna, Baron Bodissey and Dymphna, seemed to have latched onto the idea that making complete horses' asses out of themselves was the surest path to total victory over the biggest horses' ass in the "counterjihad" stable, Mr. Johnson.

Victory, however, was not to be theirs. Not only had Charles Johnson refused to admit the error of his ways, despite mountains of "proof" supplied by Herr Baron, but all the worse, Gates of Vienna comment threads were showing unmistakable signs of war-weariness. It seems the poor dears were put off by the notion of trying to bring someone with obviously crypto-Leftist sympathies back into the fold. In any event, by the end of the week the fearless Baron and the equally fearless Dymphna were waving the white flag. Per the Baron:

OK, I’ve read all the emails and looked at all the comments. I get the message!

As if I didn’t already want to be rid of That Awful Topic.

The job had to be done first, and it has been. Now we really can do something else.

No one’s mind is going to be changed in either direction by any further argument.

I no longer consider Little Green Footballs to be a reliable source of information.

Therefore I will not discuss it any more, nor will Dymphna. I won’t answer any emails on the topic. There is nothing left to be said. I’m sure there will be more videos and photos that prove that Filip Dewinter is a Nazi, but I’m not going to deal with them.

We’re done. Finished. We have officially Moved On.

I note this development with undisguised glee.

These same people - the ones who couldn't stand up to a half-assed blog war with Charles Johnson and the retards at Little Green Footballs - are now going back to the serious business of telling us all how to stand up to and fight back against the stone-cold killers in the vanguard of The Muslim Menace™. Evidently standing up to al-Qaeda is going to require less nerve than is required to stand up to Charles Johnson. That's good to know, I guess, and brings a certain amount of relief to those of us wondering if we will possess the courage to man the battlements when the time for action comes…

In the meantime, this incident stands as a sobering reminder of just how pathetic these folks are. Let's remember that this dust-up between Little Green Footballs and Gates of Vienna began over who was - and was not - going to attend a "counterjihad" conference. That's right, a conference. It is December, 2007, and that's where the vaunted Saviors of Western Civilization are in the thankless but necessary of saving you and I and countless future generations from The Muslim Menace™… fearlessly fighting each other over who will attend a conference. That is the sum total of the progress the "counterjihad" movement has made in just six years…

Imagine what they'll have accomplished by December, 2013.

And of course Charles Johnson wouldn't be Charles Johnson if he didn't keep plowing ahead as if the war with Gates of Vienna was still in full swing… Acting as though proving the supposed crypto-Fascist sympathies of Vlaams Belang was the most important thing in the world. Which, in his world, it probably is. Let's face facts here: It was no accident that Charles Johnson just happened to find Vlaams Belang objectionable on the eve of having to actually do something (i.e. - attend the "counterjihad" conference). Charles Johnson didn't raise himself to prominence (if that is indeed the correct term for what he has become) by actually fighting The Muslim Menace™. No, he's where he is because he has a talent for running his mouth. I've met the man, and quite frankly, I don't think he has it in him to do anything else…

So the bottom line is this: You'll never see Charles Johnson, Baron Bodissey or Dymphna actually doing anything of value in Saving Western Civilization. It's been six years and they're just to the point where they're starting to fight each other about how to start talking about how to do whatever they're going to start trying to do to counter The Muslim Menace™. It's the same story with every other bigot, crank and hustler out there working this particular Elmer Gantry routine for fun and profit… and in lieu of actually doing something concrete and constructive. It is obvious to most of us that folks like Roger Simon and Robert Spencer and Michelle Malkin will talk about The Muslim Menace™ until the day they die or it no longer pays. It is equally obvious that, no matter how dire their warnings and no matter how grim their predictions, we will never see any of them inconveniencing themselves by backing their words with action.

This is all about running their mouths.

And in that respect, strangely, they are the perfect right-side bookend to Al Gore's legion of Global Warming motor-mouths and hucksters, who rack up millions of miles (generating tons and tons of nasty ol' carbon) jetting across Gaia to deliver speeches, attend conferences and warn us in appropriately apocalyptic terms of what we must do to defeat The Warming Menace™… All talk, no action.

Or to be more specific, all talk and no concrete, constructive action. Other than Al demonstrating his seriousness by buying beachfront property, that is...

Then again, as I suspect history will judge the "counterjihad" movement as being more an impediment to winning the War on Terror than anything else, perhaps the fact that they're pudknockers isn't such a bad thing.

Note: Gates of Vienna is becoming quite the source of unintentional hilarity…

First, we have the Baron saying - with a completely straight face - this:

I no longer consider Little Green Footballs to be a reliable source of information.

Gee, ya think? Not that anyone at Gates of Vienna would understand why that particular statement would bring on a gale of laughter, mind you…

Then we have this:

Readers may be looking for an alternative to LGF for news aggregation. As I said before, Gates of Vienna is not the place to go for news. But below the fold is a list of English-language blogs that I consider worthwhile for news and analysis.

Guess who's on the list?

Atlas Shrugs

You can't make this stuff up.

Yet Another Note: I've received an email from an outraged counterjihad-type person who correctly accuses me of not thaking the "threat of Islam" seriously. What I take seriously is the War on Terror... The war against an enemy whose aims are temporal, expansionist and imperialist and whose political agenda is cloaked in explicitly religious terms. When I hear someone start in on the dire threat posed by "Islam" -i.e., the religion - I know I'm dealing with either a bigot or a fool. And, by definition, a pudknocker... The sort of person who convinces themselves they're doing very serious work by noodling around at websites like LGF and GoV, or cherrypicking verses of the Koran, or arguing over whether an obscure Flemish political party is crypto-Nazi or not. You may take yourself quite seriously, but that doesn't mean I have to...

Genuinely Creepy… Genuinely Disingenuous

As I noted in Pudknockers… And the People's Front of Judea, last Friday I picked up a link from Gates of Vienna. Prior to picking up on the fight between Little Green Footballs and Gates of Vienna last week, I'd never spent more than a couple of minutes at Gates of Vienna. The reason for that was obvious: It's just another of those completely generic "the Muslims are gonna take over the world and kill us all if we don't something right now" blogs that grow along the sides of the Republican/Conservative blogosphere like so many weeds.

By the time I had put up Pudknockers, I had actually done some reading at Gates of Vienna and was really getting creeped out by what I'd found. Evidently much of the "counter-jihad" movement centers around such civilized and eminently practical notions as having nations such as the U.S. designate Islam as a political, as opposed to religious creed, thus allowing "us" to circumvent the constitutional protections afforded religion practice and expression, forced conversion of Muslims to Christianity, and the internment of all Muslim who refuse to do so, banning the Koran and legislating that quoting the Koran be regarded as "hate speech", and my personal favorite - inciting Muslims to violence so as to provoke a widespread, violent anti-Muslim backlash.

Suddenly the sensitivity exhibited by Gates of Vienna and the "counter-jihad" movement to charges of being sympathetic to fascism became very clear… And once my skin had stopped crawling, I decided to send an email to Gates of Vienna requested that they remove the link to Dennis The Peasant. This is what I sent:

GOV-

Evidently one of your readers has linked to my site in the comments section of “Gates of Vienna Requires a Correction from Charles Johnson”. As a matter of courtesy, would you please remove the link.

Thank you,

Dennis the Peasant

It wasn't too long before I received a reply from one Dymphna of Gates of Vienna denying my request. She noted that the commenter who had posted the link had not violated any aspect of Gates of Vienna's policy on commenting, and felt that removing the link under those circumstances would be embarrassing to the commenter. It's hard to argue with that line of reasoning in and of itself, and if Dymphna had left it at that, I wouldn't be writing this post. But she didn't leave at that, and what she went on to say really honked me off… Specifically:

She read my site and enjoyed it,
She found my humor to be "rather like Wodehouse in ways", and
She was "wounded" by the opinions I had expressed about Gates of Vienna in A Bit Of Speculation.

Maybe I'm allowing my naturally taciturn temperament to get the best of me, but Dymphna's reply struck me as being, shall we say, disingenuous. I consider it beyond argument that anyone who would compare my humor to that of P.G. Wodehouse's has either never read me or never read Wodehouse. Or both. I mentioned the comment to Muffy, who adores P.G. Wodehouse, and she laughed out loud. She then pointed out that if my humor was similar to Wodehouse's, she'd actually read Dennis The Peasant.

Beyond that, anyone who was actually paying attention would know that I would find the "counter-jihad" movement and its supporters to be beneath contempt. Period. Given that I've been harping on the racism and bigotry that is part-and-parcel of the "counter-jihad" movement for the last couple of years, I find it remarkable that Dymphna would consider I'd do anything other that loathe Gates of Vienna. I also find it remarkable that she's surprised that I'd express such loathing in rather bald terms. This has never been a site for the faint of heart in that respect…

So the bottom line is this: I think she was trying to jerk me around.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, though. After all, doesn't the conflict between Gates of Vienna and Little Green Footballs really revolve around middle-class bigots trying to maintain the veneer of middle-class respectability? What easier way to avoid the real issue at hand than by adopting a tone of surprise and aggrievement?

Pud-Knockers… And the Peoples Front of Judea!

Reg: Listen. If you really wanted to join the P.F.J., you'd have to really hate the Romans.
Brian: I do!
Reg: Oh, yeah? How much?
Brian: A lot!
Reg: Right. You're in. Listen. The only people we hate more than the Romans are the fucking Judean People's Front.
Francis: Yeah...
Judith: Splitters.
Reg: Splitters...
Francis: And the Judean Popular People's Front.
Judith/Reg: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
Loretta: And the People's Front of Judea.
Judith/Reg/Francis: Yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
Reg: What?
Loretta: The People's Front of Judea. Splitters.
Reg: We're the People's Front of Judea!
Loretta: Oh. I thought we were the Popular Front.
Reg: People's Front!
Francis: Whatever happened to the Popular Front, Reg?
Reg: He's over there.
Judith/Reg/Francis/Loretta: Splitter!

-Life of Brian

Pancho Barnes: What are you two rookies gonna have?
Gordon Cooper: Rookies? Now hold on, sis. You are looking at a whole new ballgame here now. In fact, in a couple of years, I bet you're even gonna immortalize us by putting our pictures up there on your wall.
[unwittingly referring to the dead pilot memorial over the bar]
Gordon Cooper: What? I say somethin' wrong here?
Pancho Barnes: I'll tell you what. We got two categories of pilots around here. We got your prime pilots that get all the hot planes, and we got your pud-knockers who dream about getting the hot planes. Now what are you two pud-knockers gonna have? Huh?

- The Right Stuff

Perhaps the most distasteful element of blogging is that random link you end up with that, upon investigation, turns your stomach. It's the sort of link which brings the kind of people to your site that, on both specific and general principles, you'd cross the street to avoid. Unfortunately, it seems I have that sort of link right now.

It seems that the unfortunate by-product of my A Bit Of Speculation post on Charles Johnson's departure from Pajamas Media has been a link from the comments section of Gates of Vienna. These are the folks who are presently at war with the Little Green Footballs crowd over who is actually a right-and-proper "counter-jihadist". Whatever the fuck that is… All I know is these are just the sort of folks I cannot abide. They are loudmouths and timewasters.

Which is exactly what I am.

However, the difference between this asshole and those assholes centers on the fact that I actually realize I'm a loudmouth and a timewaster. And that is very much a key distinction. I understand that being fat and 50, with a lifetime of mediocrity behind me, the chances are very high that nothing I do from this point on in my life is going to make much difference in the Grand Scheme of Things. This does not mean I do not either think or worry about much of what goes on these days. It just means that I understand there are limits to which I can expend energy on such matters before appearing to be a horse's patoot to those both inside and outside my little circle of friends and family.

Unfortunately most of these "counter-jihadists" seem to lack the degree of self-awareness I possess.

Which qualifies as a fairly damning indictment, if you think about it.

It's pretty clear that what the "counter-jihadists" at Gates of Vienna and Little Green Footballs worry about these days isn't the actual "jihadists" out there, but rather the non-conforming "counter-jihadists" that seem to have popped up at Little Green Footballs and Gates of Vienna. In my own humble opinion, this lack of - shall we say - focus is directly proportional to the lack of self-awareness exhibited by the participants on both sides. Otherwise, they'd have all noticed just how silly they appear to normal folk… Thus proving to all but themselves that they aren't serious "counter-jihadists", but, rather, a bunch of loud-mouthed splitters and time-wasting pud-knockers.

It would be funny if it wasn't so pathetic.