Dennis the Peasant

Here's A Hint: The Problem Revolves Around Obama Having To Make A Decision...

It seems Matt Drudge is sounding the alarm about Barack Obama's weight loss.

The Obama Administration says it's the result of hard exercise and skipping meals because the President is just too darn busy saving the universe to be bothered with the ingestion of comestibles.

I'll buy the first part, but not the second. Given what we know about Barack Obama's decisiveness, I'll bet the White House chef keeps giving him choices for dinner and Obama and his team haven't yet managed to finish their detailed review of the menu.

It's rumored that McChrystal is lobbying for the cheeseburger and fries, Michelle is pushing the organic tofu surprise, and the rest of the staff is trying to explain to Joe Biden what a menu is.

Wherein Form Follows, Er, Form...

I can't say this Slate article by Chris Wilson is the sort of thing I would normally comment on, but read it yourself and see if what struck me strikes you...

Wilson states the White House using Drupal site management software is bad for the following reasons:

1. Drupal knows best ("It's not that Drupal thinks you're evil. It just thinks you're ignorant."),
2. Drupal is impenetrable,
3. Drupal hates change,
4. Drupal is disorganized, and...
5. Drupal is righteous.

It took me a moment, and then I understood exactly why the White House chose Drupal:

It's the software that is Barack Obama!

After all, what is Obama if not...

1. Egotistical,
2. Impenetrable,
3. Conventional,
4. Disorganized, and...
5. Self-righteous?

It's a match made in Heaven.

Quote Of The Day...

Today's funniest quote regarding President Obama's Nobel Peace Prize... From the man I'd be most likely to describe as "two lips in search of a derriere", Andrew Sullivan:

Reading through all the reactions, compiled by Chris and Patrick, there are two obvious points: this is premature and this is thoroughly deserved.

Logic isn't one of Andrew's strong points these days. A mancrush will do that sort of thing to you.

Today's Dennis the Peasant "Are You A Moron?" Test...

If you can say this:

Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize,

Or this:

Barack Obama deserved the Nobel Peace Prize,

Without bursting into hysterical laughter...

You're a moron.

Here's an idea for a new Obama t-shirt:

I Went To Europe For The Olympics And All I Got Was This Stupid Nobel Peace Prize

Reality Would Be Where, Exactly?

He was not only a bore, he bored for England.

                                              -Malcolm Muggeridge, on Anthony Eden

Can anyone identify the point of President Obama's Sunday Morning Borefest? The only thing I can think of is this: Barack Obama loves to listen to Barack Obama talk. What else could it be? Here's what he did say:

1. Despite having a House bill that can't pass in the Senate and a Senate bill that won't pass in the House (or the Senate, for that matter), he still wants health care, er, insurance, er whatever the fuck it is today reform right away.
2. He wants to win in Afghanistan but is "skeptical" of providing the military the resources needed to do the job. Warm up the bus, because Gen. McChrystal is going under it soon.
3. And while you're at it, keep the bus running for ACORN. Obama was blasé about the organization's troubles, and refused to call for defunding, but let's get real here: Does anyone think Barack Obama is going to fight for ACORN funding?

This is getting more Carteresque by the moment...

Yet Another Reason I Don't Take This 'Back To Nature' Bullshit Seriously...

Yes, Deary, let's shop:

Let's say you're preparing dinner and you realize with dismay that you don't have any certified organic Tuscan kale. What to do?

Here's how Michelle Obama handled this very predicament Thursday afternoon:

The Secret Service and the D.C. police brought in three dozen vehicles and shut down H Street, Vermont Avenue, two lanes of I Street and an entrance to the McPherson Square Metro station. They swept the area, in front of the Department of Veterans Affairs, with bomb-sniffing dogs and installed magnetometers in the middle of the street, put up barricades to keep pedestrians out, and took positions with binoculars atop trucks. Though the produce stand was only a block or so from the White House, the first lady hopped into her armored limousine and pulled into the market amid the wail of sirens.

Then, and only then, could Obama purchase her leafy greens. "Now it's time to buy some food," she told several hundred people who came to watch. "Let's shop!"

Cowbells were rung. Somebody put a lei of marigolds around Obama's neck. The first lady picked up a straw basket and headed for the "Farm at Sunnyside" tent, where she loaded up with organic Asian pears, cherry tomatoes, multicolored potatoes, free-range eggs and, yes, two bunches of Tuscan kale. She left the produce with an aide, who paid the cashier as Obama made her way back to the limousine.

There's nothing like the simple pleasures of a farm stand to return us to our agrarian roots.

No fucking problem with the carbon footprint of that little back-to-nature adventure, right?

Morons. Both of 'em.

Now What?

So much for game-changing speeches.

So much for "Win one for Teddy". 

Max Baucus hasn't even presented his big compromise bill and it is already starting to stiffen:

The top Republican on the Senate Finance Committee said Tuesday that he could not support sweeping health care legislation drafted in more than three months of bipartisan negotiations by the chairman of the panel, and several liberal Democrats criticized the bill from the other side of the political spectrum.

Well, Barack Obama, super-genius, decided the smart thing to do was let Baucus do his heavy lifting. Now he has a Senate bill that satisfies neither Democrats nor Republicans. That means when set next to the House effort, Obama has a matching pair of unpopular and unpassable health care, er, insurance, er whatever the fuck it is today reform bills.

So now what? Another speech? Another townhall? More interviews?

You know, there's an excellent chance we will all die of old age before Barack Obama actually figures out what he actually wants and how to get it, thus rendering the issue of reform somewhat moot.

We're Gonna Need A Bigger Bus...

Again!

The Spineless One tosses yet another drone under the bus:

Glenn Beck has struck again.

Yosi Sergant, who recently popped up on Beck's radar for his involvement in a conference call on national service, has been asked to resign as communications director by the National Endowment for the Arts, sources familiar with the move tell the Huffington Post.

At issue was an August conference call in which the NEA encouraged select artists to participate in an administration project dubbed "United We Serve" and led by the first lady.

Beck attacked Sergant and the NEA on his Fox News talk show, accusing the agency of propaganda efforts similar to those used by Nazi Germany. And now Sergant has been tossed overboard, making him Beck's second victim in his campaign to rid the administration of perceived radicals, socialists, communists, fascists, anarchists and all other manner of nefarious influences.

You know what? If you're the President of the fuckin' United States and you can't handle Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin, you have no business being the President of the fuckin' United States.

Period.

How To Measure The Flop...

Want an interesting measure of how badly Obama's speech flopped last night?

Check out how much space is being devoted to Joe Wilson's "You lie!" outburst on lefty websites.

If Obama's speech had really been the big game changer it was supposed to be, it would be the topic of conversation.

The Most Striking Aspect Of Last Night's Speech...

Here's the text of President Obama's "high stakes" health care, er, insurance, er, whatever the fuck it is today reform speech that was delivered last night.

Having had the chance to read it over carefully, I find one overriding - and striking - aspect to the speech:

Barack Obama has learned nothing from any of the events of August. 

And when I say nothing, I mean nothing. That speech could have been written in the last week of July and put on a shelf. It's as though the townhall rebellions never happened. It fails to acknowledge any of the realities that were manifest on September 8, 2009.

First, Obama did not provide a detailed vision of what he must have in the health care, er, insurance, er, whatever the fuck it is today reform legislation when it comes to his desk. Not a single hint of any willingness to lead. Again. It is now September 9, 2009 and we still have no idea what health care, er, insurance, er, whatever the fuck it is today reform actually is. Neither does Congress.

Second, Obama stuck to the laughable proposition that the public option is still in play. Oh sure, the President's flaks will claim that is only to keep it on the table for a bargaining chip, but the fact of the matter is this: You can't bargain with something that doesn't exist. Opponents of the public option aren't going to give anything away because they don't have to. It's dead. By leaving it on the table, Obama has only ensured that there will be a prolonged and messy fight over the issue in the House.

Third, Obama offered nothing new to dampen public skepticism of reform. He assurances were over generalized, bland and fully of weasel words. If citizens expected to come away with answers to their criticisms, they were most likely disappointed. Again, Obama focuses on dismissing any or all criticism as either uninformed or politically motivated.

Fourth, again... No mention of how this shit gets paid for. The whole "we can save money by enacting this reform" has failed the Laugh Test since Day One. And polling suggests this is a major concern for voters. But answering that concern would involve some tough choices. So, instead of offering something concrete, Obama continues to pretend that the financing of reform is some sort of minor detail that can be attended to later.

I could go on, but you get the picture.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Barack Obama, for all his super-geniusness, is one of the most rigid, blinkered and unimaginative souls I've ever seen in high office. The range of his mighty intellect runs the gamut from A to B. That he would offer up a July speech in September simply highlights that fact.